Performing at the Jerusalem Theatre… with the Beginners

Last week, B"H, I had the thrill once again of performing on stage at the Jerusalem Theatre. Bright lights. Applause. Adrenaline.

And yet, I wasn't dancing in a dazzling sequence costume with my steel-shuffling troupe. I was performing with the beginner tap group.

No… I did not accidentally wander into the wrong dance number or forget where I was supposed to be!

FINDING A NEW ROLE

I have been tap dancing for twenty years.

Twenty years.

At this point in life, I should probably be teaching the beginners. Instead, I joined them.

Not because I stopped “real” dancing or lost the place I had earned in our kick line. And definitely not because I stopped loving it. But because my ankle and knee recently decided they were no longer interested in jumping high or f-lapping faster than a speeding bullet. Apparently, my joints have been holding meetings without me, and decided: “Effective immediately: reduce high-impact commitments.”

So I adapted.

That's how I found myself in beginners’ tap, relearning steps I once knew in my sleep.

At first, it felt strange. Who willingly goes backwards? But you know what? Beginners don’t agonize about what they used to be able to do. They simply try to do it now. And that’s surprisingly peaceful.

TWO TAP LIVES

Now, I haven’t left my veteran tap class. I’m still there too. Every week. Standing beside dancers who sometimes perform steps that my arthritic ankle and knee look at with deep suspicion.

So I’ve become something of a choreographer for one. When a routine asks for a step my joints politely refuse, I don’t leave the line, I adjust. I simplify. I substitute. I improvise. And you know what, everyone still smiles and loves me.

It’s not always easy, and occasionally I suspect my body and I are performing two slightly different dances to the same music. But I stay in the room. And that matters more to me than anything else, because I love my troupe and I want to dance with them as long as I can.

So my week now has two tap lives:

In the veteran class, I stretch myself, adapt my steps, and try to stay part of something bigger and more complex than what I can comfortably do alone. In the beginner class, I relearn, rebuild, and remind myself that joy doesn’t require expertise. Between the two, I keep dancing.

ON STAGE

And then something unexpected happened. We performed at the Jerusalem Theatre. Yes. The beginners’ troupe. There I stood under stage lights, feeling exactly the same thrill I have felt for years at every stage of dance.

The stage, it turns out, doesn’t care what your level is. It only cares that you give your all and shine out   your personal aura. And the audience doesn’t come to measure technical perfection. It comes to feel your love and enthusiasm, your willingness to share your gift across the footlights.

LIFE IS MULTI-DIRECTIONAL

Many of us believe that life moves in one direction only: Forward ..to.. better ..to.. more advanced ..to.. more capable.

But then, one day life quietly introduces a different curriculum: Oy vey, so... adapt ..and.. simplify ..and.. begin again.

At seventy, I’m learning that “beginner” is not a downgrade. It’s a skill. A state of mind. Really... a privilege.

There is something deeply honest about the beginners’ class. No pretending. No hiding. No comparison to who you used to be. Just: Can I do this step today? And if not, can I do a version of it that still lets me dance?

So, here I am tapping in two worlds, and I’ve discovered something important: I am still a dancer.

Not because I move the way I used to. But because I still move. And I still say yes to the stage.

Maybe that’s the real secret of this stage of life. You don’t stop performing when things change. You learn new ways to stay in the dance.

And if that means being a beginner at seventy … then I’ll take it. And tap on.

She Hung Up Her Tap Shoes. I’m Still Lacing Mine.

Last year, at 71, my friend Fayge hung up her tap shoes. 

Not dramatically. Not with a final Broadway bow.

Just quietly. After eighteen years of shuffle-ball-change, costume mishaps, and late-night laughter.

When we began dancing at 50 (me) and 52 (Fayge), we were on top of our game. (Yes, really.)

As the years went by, tap became more challenging, but we did our best with a determined smile. And there is a moment we often shared that I treasure most.

After a particularly difficult step - the kind that requires fierce concentration and silent prayer - when we somehow managed to execute it without collapsing into each other, Fayge and I would reach out and squeeze hands. No words. Just that squeeze.

We did it.

That squeeze said: We’re still here.
Still moving.
Still brave enough to try.

WOMEN OF STEEL

But tap is not simple at any age. It demands speed, precision, strong knees, cooperative ankles.

Now Fayge and I have none of those things.

Fayge was diagnosed with Parkinson’s years ago. Yet, she kept dancing. She kept showing up every Tuesday night with lipstick on and her tap shoes laced tight. But last season she decided that the turns and the quick movements – um, tap is mostly turns and quick movements - were asking more than her body could give.

So she chose to stop.

ALONE ON THE DANCE FLOOR

So, here I am. Seventy years old.
In a class of women ranging from 33 to 50 … and then… me.

I have arthritis in my ankle, which makes my shuffles occasionally slur in ways I’d rather not discuss, and hops live only in my mind. My knee, injured two years ago, still negotiates every fast combination. When the choreography calls for “quick and light,” I do my best to remember what that once felt like.

Still, Tuesday night tap is my happy place.

KEEPING MOVING

Fayge may have hung up her tap shoes, but she didn’t hang up her dance costumes. She still performs in “The Walker Dance,” a joyful piece filled with women over sixty who march and sway with more energy than orthopedists would advise. (We dance with walkers, but B"H, they're still props.) Fayge does yoga. She exercises. She shows up for life.

And she still belongs to our tap family.

She keeps in touch. She cheers us on. She lives in our inside jokes. Even without the shoes, she is part of the rhythm.

And me?

Fayge has officially made me the oldest tap dancer in Gush Etzion.

For now, I am choosing to stay. To shuffle imperfectly. To ice my ankle. To stand in a room full of younger women and claim my place anyway.

One day, I too may hang up my shoes.

But not yet.

For now, when the music starts and the floor answers back, I am still reaching for that invisible hand squeeze.

Still here.
Still moving.
Still dancing.

(Photos by our dear friends - Rebecca Kowalsky and Beth Lanin)

 

Just Dance!

On Isru Chag, I'll be tap dancing in two numbers for the Efrat Community Center end-of-the-year dance recital. Six-year-olds will twirl in their tutus. Teenagers will energize the audience with their hip hop. I'll be joining our tap troupe, Steps Ahead, as we dazzle on the dance floor with a dozen women from 16 to 65.

Most of us have been dancing together with incredible choreographer Judy Feinerman Kizer for 11 years now. My daughter Bati was the youngest then, 15 years old, and today the youngest is adorable Shira. We're a dancing family - every age, every background, every body type - and we're happiest when we're together. Of course, for Fayge at 65 and me at 63, it's not as easy as it used to be. Our shuffles are not as fast and our flaps sometimes don't sound so sharp.
But we love to tap, and as long as our dancing family will have us, we'll keep practicing and trying to keep up.
Dancing gives us joy. It surrounds us with the women we love. It's healthy too - good for the heart, the brain, the muscles, balance, etc.
So, I may not be so light or quick on my feet anymore, but you won't see anyone with a bigger smile or having more fun out there on the dance floor.